Month: March 2013

Start with crayons

The Easter Bunny Doesn’t Poop Chocolate

I know that a mythical bunny leaving candy-filled plastic eggs on your lawn has nothing to do with religion. But it’s a tradition that I love and I love that my daughter is old enough now to get into it. What I don’t want her getting into is a sugar-induced-toddler-frenzy ending in some form of tragedy. So even though I bought 12 different kinds of Easter candy to decorate cupcakes, very little of it is going into those aforementioned eggs. I’m stuffing those plastic vessels with fun non-chokeworthy gifts, including hair ties, stickers, and DIY crayons.

This post is about the crayons I attempted to make. Some were successful. Some were pitiful.

I should have found these tutorials (SheKnows, MakeandTakes, GabrielsGoodTidings) before starting, but as usual, I thought I’d just figure it out and forge ahead.

But here’s what I did:

1) You’ll need: crayons, a silicone mold (for making confections), a ziploc baggie, a cookie sheet, and a blunt object (to smash crayons). Optional: exacto knife to slit crayon peels. And you’re smart people–you know which to give your kids and which to keep away from them.

2) Preheat your oven to 225-250.

3) Follow along:

Start with crayons
Start with crayons, broken or whole.
Peel your crayons.
Peel. This can be made easier with an exacto knife.
Crush 'em. I just put them all in a baggie and smashed with a meat tenderizer. You can keep colors separate if you like.
Crush ’em. I just put them all in a baggie and smashed with a meat tenderizer. You can keep colors separate if you like.
Froggy mold for DIY crayons.
This froggy mold came from Japan, but you can get silicone molds at Ikea.
Melt the crayons.
Melt ’em. Fill the molds completely. This was about 5 minutes into baking.
Fill your molds completely.
I tried adding more bits halfway through. I do not recommend this. Just fill them enough at the beginning.
Some good, some bad, some ugly DIY crayons.
Some came out, some did not. Read my tips below.

Basically, I’d recommend filling your molds overfull. Don’t let them melt to liquid because the colors get really muddy. It’s fun when they swirl a bit, but too much and it’s not as pretty. But what toddler really cares? Right? And don’t (like me) try to add more chunks halfway through to make the molds full. Basically, you’ll have a liquid mess at the bottom, and crayon chunks on top.

Overall, this was super easy. It took about 15 minutes altogether and could be fun to do with the kiddos.

We’ll see what mine thinks of the Easter bunny after she opens her eggs!

To-Do lists

How Google Docs Cleaned my Dining Room Table

To-Do lists
To Do: Get rid of all the lists.

As you know, I’m a crazy list-maker. This is not limited to To-Do Lists. There is also the “Thank You for the Christmas Gifts” list (ah-hem, it’s MARCH), “Talk to General Contractors About This” list, “Potty Training for Dummy Parents” list…it goes on. My other problem is that these lists are written on dozens of scraps of paper and scattered around my dining room table. “Hey, Smarty, why don’t you keep it in a notebook like a normal human being?” Yeah, well, nobody’s perfect.

Well, it JUST occurred to me that I can transcribe these into Google docs. I won’t lose them. They won’t turn into soggy coasters. I will be able to eat at the table again. (Goodbye coffee table picnics!)

So thanks, Google Docs. You cleaned my dining room table. When is Google Sewing coming out? I could use a digital sewing machine.

All Supermoms Cheat

I am staring down a chillingly long to-do list tonight and on it: “Bake cookies for Teacher Appreciation Day” at my daughter’s daycare. Oh HELL no.

Here’s the thing. I LOVE her teachers. They’re amazing. They go far beyond what I could do as a parent, and I am so grateful. But do you think they’ll understand that less if it’s not home-baked chocolate chip cookies I bring to their break room? No. So, I’m going to do what any true Supermom would do in this type of situation. I’m gonna cheat. I’m {gasp} buying cookies. Tomorrow morning. On the way to school. Like, not even ahead of time.

Believe it or not, this is a total Supermom move, and I’m not ashamed. Kittens will be rescued, fires will be put out, and I will still appropriately show my gratitude to people I appreciate. The time savings will be enough to allow me to press my cape and polish my belt. And tackle that massive pile of laundry tonight. To the Grocery Store…and Beyond!

via anenglishwomaninsalem.wordpress.com
The disposal is motherforking broken

Flying Solo

As a wife with a husband who occasionally travels for work, I am prone to put a lot of pressure on myself to take on the role of both parents while he’s gone. So instead of wallowing in the failure to put away clean laundry or wash all the dishes, I’m going to share this week’s successes with you all:

1. I took out the trash
This is a BIG DEAL. For whatever reason, I hate this chore. Maybe it’s putting on mismatched slip-on shoes to trudge through the cold dark alley, maybe it’s the smell, I don’t know. I hate it, but I did it.

2. I fixed the garbage disposal
This is less of a big deal. I’m a pretty handy lady, but I occasionally have vivid horror-movie visions of my arm getting chewed up by demonic blades. Turns out, a toddler-sized fork was crammed in there. Sorry, kiddo.

The disposal is motherforking broken
The disposal is motherforking FIXED

Continue reading “Flying Solo”